If you're considering buying a house, you should not own a home if...
- Home prices are reduced in this buyer's market and you can never resist a sale.
- You're paying your bills with credit cards and racking up over limit fees.
- You have four children, a St. Bernard and three goldfish but can only afford a one bedroom efficiency.
- Just because the first month's mortgage payment is waived.
- You relocate as frequently as you brush your teeth.
- You don't know how to use a toilet plunger, hammer, lawn mower, garage door opener or dehumidifier and you can't afford to pay someone who does.
- You think that a $40,000 house with no roof is a great idea and your roofer friend who will put one on for a six pack is moving to Miami.
- Your time line for living in your new home is the same time line as the bank's foreclosure process.
- You're banking on paying your mortgage by renting your bedrooms to friends who don't have jobs.
- You're planning on quitting your six-figure job and following your dream of selling ice sculptures on eBay.
- You don't know the difference between the smell of leaking gas from the furnace and Downy fabric softener.
- You think your landlord will come over at 2am when your water heater is flooding your basement.
- You're planning on using your security deposit to pay for your closing costs and your cat has marked his territory in every corner of the living room.
- You want to buy a fixer upper and your idea of rehab is not drinking in your new home.
- You're influenced by an episode on HGTV where they remodeled an entire home for under $500 because they have a carpenter on staff named MacGyver.
- You can't afford appliances for your new home so you're going to eat out every night to save for them.
- You don't know how to let your friends inside without buzzing them in.
- You've never changed a light bulb but at the end of every "This Old House" episode, you say: "Man, I could've done that blindfolded."
- You need to work 96 hours a week including Christmas to afford your new mortgage payment.
- Your spouse is the bread winner and you're contemplating divorce.
- You can't fill out the change of address card at the post office because you haven't paid taxes for five years and you're hiding from the FBI.
- You're getting married and want to buy a home because everyone thinks you should except you.
- You don't get along with people and can only afford a condo in a 146 unit high rise.
- You believe that being over extended and house poor is okay as long as you fit in.
- You are competitive and obsessive compulsive and your last name is Smith and your new neighbor's last name is Jones.
- You love nature and view the roots coming into the foundation as a thing of beauty and art.
- You're planning on using a website to look at properties other than YouShouldOwn.com.
posted by Cecilia Sherrard at
7/07/2008
8 Comments:
I love this post. My mother-in-law is a realtor and she's told me a couple of stories about anonymous home owners (anonymous to me, not her) who didn't know what they were doing.
Anyway, I especially love the one about the tree roots. We just had a small problem with our plumbing thanks to trees, and boy! Yeah, some people should just stick to renting.
That's a funny list and oh so true!! This should be taped in every real estate office on the door or maybe even as a pre-recorded phone message, though probably wouldn't be good for business!
I've seen it all and even though my job is to sell homes, there are definitely some that should stick to renting...
Thanks Jenny and Chelle... =)
I brush twice a day, but haven't spent more than 13 days in the same bed since 2006. Oh, and I change country every 10 days on average. I know dental hygiene is important, but does this really mean I'm ready to buy?
Craig... Wow, you could be my 28th reason...
You might consider buying stock... instead of a home... Perhaps... Holiday Inn, Colgate, Dick's Sporting Goods, Sleeping bags R US?
Very funny and very true! Thanks for the post. I am going to link to it from my blog.
Aloha,
Keahi
Oh my goodness, I thought this was so funny, i spilled my coffee on my lap. It is a good thing I'm not house poor and can afford Bounty paper towels :).
I'm getting the last laugh at all my old friends, (maybe ex friends) that thought it was so important to have two cars and live far from where they work in "highly sought after locations" (although a good ivestment) and now have to pay the child's school tuition on gas etc. I live modestly for the long term. Altough, i won't get rich quick on my home, it is my home, and I think people put way too much pressure on themselves to fill their homes with stuff instead of enjoying their lives. Balance is a good thing, and I think the current state of the economy is a wake up call to everyone.
Thanks Keahi... Glad you liked it enough to share it with your readers.
To the last comment, I absolutely agree. In the times we're in and the fact that life is short, happiness and balance is necessary. There's just a little too much hype in this current society on crazy things... Weight, status, wrinkles, how deep your tan is, how large your... home is, etc.
Your home is where you go to get away from the chaos and mundane chores of life. It should be an oasis and a stress-free environment. Not a money pit or headache...
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